My name is Elizabeth Rae Yana. I am a thirty-two year old woman that has lived over two lifetimes of happiness and hurt, and if you ask me, life is pretty damn good. I have not always felt like this, for a long time I almost felt like there was someone specifically holding me back, until one day, I realized it was me.

Why do we make life so hard? I remember lying on the beach looking out into an ocean that looked like it was filled with every question and answer in the universe, and it hit me…. Life is Simple….  Life is not always easy, but if you step back, take a look at the forest, the tree never looks so big.

Breath poured out of me like the ocean itself was taking it with its tide. The weight of a thousand oceans left my shoulders…. Life is Simple…. So why was I making it so difficult?

After that day, Life was Simple…. I made sure it stayed that way.

I am publishing these pages of writing and “coffee-talk” with the intent of spreading peace, and to help make someone like myself, who searched and searched to find themselves, start living. I am no doctor, or even a nurse, nor would I like to be, but these methods or words have freed me more than any procedure, and I won’t send you a bill….  I also need to learn from you, your experiences are different than mine are, so I have a lot to gain from knowing you.

I was raised by my mother, a charming, and loving woman, and once a week I would sit quietly and listen to my mother and Aunt Katie have coffee, they would sit and tell each other their issues or successes, and they would “get down to brass tacks”, and that’s when they would solve these problems, and they did, if they would come across something so hard, they couldn’t find a solution, they would let each other cry, and calmly offer a lipstick, see in our family, if your lipstick’s okay, you will eventually be fine. You know, the rule is true, I have always made it, and thanks to both Mom, and Aunt Kate, my lipstick has always been monitored closely, they may have something here!

Thank you for enjoying my Simple Life with me,

Lizzy

So I recently sent out an email to about 100 of my closest friends to come up with the recipe of a “great friend”. Never would I have thought that it would have received such an overwhelming response. People are proud to talk about what type of friends they have, are, want to be, and require. Up to this point this has been the most popular subject on Lets Coffee Talk.

This has also allowed me to think more about the type of friend that I am and the type of friends that I have embraced. Truthfully, in this process it has made me so grateful for some of the people in my life, it has made me miss some long lost friends, and made me consider that maybe some of my friends are better than others, some credit is just not due to some of the people I have been giving it to.

The thought process has been eye opening. I have found that some of the friends I have are actually better friends than I thought, and others really are not as good as they once were. Once thing is for sure, it has made me so much more aware and grateful for the people past and present that have drifted through my journey with me.

Laughter

I like to laugh. I find the world so funny, I find myself funny, I want to find you funny, and a friend must find life’s most mundane things amusing. There is really nothing that is not funny if you are looking for humor within it. My life has had some crappy times, but in and out of it I have somehow found the humor, it is the one constant. “Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion”-Steel Magnolias. That quote says it all.

Wants to know who I am today

No one ever stays the same, people change, develop, grow, and regress, I want to be someone who wants to know me for who I am today, who I want to be, and who I wish I was not. I need someone to want to know me not for who I was yesterday, but constantly wanting to learn about my ever changing perceptions.

Giving My life

Time is our most valuable form of trade in a friendship. Time is the only thing that I can “give” to someone that says “here, I am giving you part of my life”. If you are not willing to give your time (i.e. Life) then I do not consider you to be a friend. Whether it is talking on the phone, emailing, IMing, sending a note though the mail, stopping by for coffee, making plans for dinner, what ever it is, giving your time for no other reason than you feel like someone is worth giving a part of your life to. Not because you feel sorry for them, obligated, or just bored, but you really are enriched by spending moments together.  

Straight Talk

I like to be someone that can and will say it pretty straight, I expect the same from the people I surround myself with. There should not be secrets between friends about each other. However, there should be confidentiality, the kind that not even water torture could get out of me. I believe that if a friend tells you something that is a secret it should be heard as if it was never said, that is that. With that being said, if I am fat, call me fat, if I am a jerk, call me one, and if I am in trouble, let me know. Not everything is easy to hear, but if a friend tells you before you have to figure it out, you don’t feel like you are the last to know. This is a tough one; it is the reason that I don’t have a million friendships.

Positive Living

As I have said, I have had a bit of adversity in my life, I have had some great friends to lift me from the ditches that chance threw me into. I AM grateful for those brave individuals. If I can be someone that can see the positive lessons to be learned in any situation even if it is my own or someone else’s I feel that it is a productive relationship. It is so important to take life’s curveballs and smack them out of the park, and if everyone on my team can do it, even better. My friends must be able to live in a positive world.

“Friends” is such a weird word, often used to loosely. I consider my friends as chosen family, these are the people that often are not blood related but they are burned into my heart forever. I try not to use the words “Best” friend anymore, they are all the “best”. I am grateful for the gift of friendship that all of you have given me. I am thankful for my old friends, new friends, and future friends. I will say this, I do actually have a “best” friend, it is me, and it was the hardest relationship I ever established.

My friends are the ones that bear witness to my life, they have put my existence in context to the grand scale, it is these souls that will be able to tell my story, and they are what make me real.    

I will be gathering all the feedback that I received and posting it soon.

My heart is with you on your journey,

Lizzy

Dear Coffee-Talkers,

It has been a while since I last wrote. Things have been very interesting lately. I went to Mexico, Jason and I celebrated our 1 year of living happily together, My Mom and sister came for a visit, and I have been exploring my career options more than ever.

Mexico was very interesting. It has been two years since I left the country (that is too long, I know) and what a difference a few years makes. I went there to attend a wedding of my father’s dear friend’s daughter. Did you fallow that? Any who… I went with my Dad and my sixteen year old sister Becky. Oh I forgot how hard life is when you are sixteen, you love or hate everything, such black and white, I guess as you get older and the grey forms on your head, you also gain grey areas in your perspectives. Then I suppose as you get older and the grey falls out of your head, you go back into a “black and white” mode again. I was the grey between my father and sister, and they were definitely black and white.
There were people from around the world there, mainly from the UK, but I met people from Holland, Belgium, Iran, Canary Islands, and a few other places. The big difference is the way that they treated me, the world hates us now, and I am not sure if I blame them. It is a scary time for all, and I know that the Bush administration has a lot to do with it. I suppose from a far it looks like we all did this to the world, but as I finally was able to get across to most, in democracy, we all don’t get who we voted for every time. Plus, I did harshly tell the guy from the Canary Islands that if he was happy about the money that he made with us, it only makes sense that he loses money with us too. No one is winning here, but I do know this, Americans are not loved in this world anymore, it’s sad in a way, I have always been welcomed with such open arms. I found that once I made the comment “Bush is a criminal”, they tended to get off me a little bit.
I met so many kind people, Bernardo worked at the resort, and when I say “worked” I mean it, this guy worked SO hard for his living, and his family (which I saw pictures of because he kept them in his pocket at all times, so he could remember why he does work so hard), and his honor. He invited Jason and I to his home next time we are down, he said he will cook for us, I am not sure I have ever been so honored to have an invite, he walked with so much integrity, I was so thankful to meet him.
There is something to be said for the way these Mexicans live, they work so hard, and play so hard, it is truly a spice of life place.

Jason and I living together for a year now, I cannot believe that it has been that long, what a happy time. I feel so lucky, and I no longer wait for any shoes to drop. I have figured out that we are just good for one another, and much like the universe, it’s big and powerful, and there is no need to question it. I believe, I believe! I have quit asking “Why? Why? Why?” And started saying “Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!”

I am so grateful that I have met him, but most grateful for who I can be with him, me. Just goes to show, and I know I preach this all of the time, when you can learn to sit with yourself, you know when you are sitting with someone that you respect when you finally meet them. I am grateful for today.

So, I am back, I wrote a bit about being positive about an hour ago, I’d love to hear your thoughts…… I would like to hear from you all more often, I have gotten very used to having coffee with the world.

All my Love,

Lizzy

Our World

Open your eyes my sweet and see the beauty of this world. The everlasting sky that sends you the warm kisses of sun. That soft grass that tickles your feet as you walk with it. The breeze that wraps it long strong arms around you. The ocean that dances and sings for you.  The rain that cries tears of joy for you. Let the birds whisper secrets into your ears. I will open my eyes and see you; the beauty of this world. I will send you warm kisses. I will wrap my arms around you. I will walk with you. I will dance and sing for you. I will cry tears of joy for you. I will whisper my secrets only to you. For; you, are to be my world.-Liz