Over the past few, well more than few months I have had some heated debates about the “facts” in this election. Never have I thought really that either of the Candidates are bad people, and they aren’t.

The reason that I am voting for Obama is that he inspires America to be hopeful, hard working, and positive. He restores the mindset that Washington is working for America, not the other way around. He has brought back the outlook that we are all together in this, not alone, with out fear. FDR said that the world is an unsafe place, but if you are fearful and too overprotective this country will go down, in so many words, I believe that has happened to a degree. I also believe that we can start a new; I believe that Obama is just the leader we need to start living again in Our America. Fear is debilitating and over the last seven years we have become paralyzed by the message that has been sent, I want my children if I ever have any to not only have the American dream, but not have the American nightmare we have been living for the last seven years.

I wrote on a Blog last night to express my opinion, as Americans historically have been respected for doing, and I was verbally attacked by several Americans with different views or perspectives. I respect their opinion, and if it was a majority of America who wanted McCain to be our president, I would honor “her” choice. We do not have to agree, but we must pull together as American people to make this country a better place for our children.
Who ever wins this election is who America wants to be president, and we need to love her (the people) for allowing all of us to make that choice. After all is said and done, we must love our fellow human beings, love that we are all living in this Great Land, and love our blessings.
This country has taken a turn in these short years, only we have the ability to turn her back around, regardless of who you are voting for, I beg you to be kind, do not fear, and have faith in America.

My Heart is with you on Your Journey,

Lizzy

Just by reading this, I have counted so many things I am doing wrong! I suck at Thank you notes (especially since my sister allows my children to open there birthday presents without me in the room and doesn’t write down what she got!) I know I have and wear white shoes, do sandal or strappy heals count? And I have a candle burning right now that smells like apple crumble or pumpkin pie, or something like that! Wow, a real eye opener!

Katie,

That’s why I wrote this so we all are in the “know”.

I think that yes, it is important to fill peoples mailboxes with happiness instead of bills all the time, but I will say that you are not “elegant” if you are offended if you don’t receive a “Thank you”, if you give to receive, you aren’t giving for the “right” reasons. Give out of Love, and that is all. Love cannot be received, only given, and saying “thank you” is giving love too. I simply thought that it is such a nice idea to fill mailboxes with love, instead of bills.

As for white shoes, they don’t look good for long, so in these trying times I think that it would be best to invest in something that will last a little longer. So, the book says, don’t wear them unless it is your wedding or you are under 12 years old. There are beautiful shoes out there in all shades, but they should be an investment, you should LOVE them. If you LOVE white shoes and they make you feel sexy or powerful, GODSPEED.

As for the “food” candle, hey, it is your home, if you want it to smell like food, GO FOR IT. The smells are very sweet, and make some people (me) sick. The little pink book never mentioned what kind of smell, that was my opinion!

I am grateful for your questions and my heart is with you on your journey,

I have always found that no matter what I’m going through, my sisters, mothers (plural in my case) and my girlfriends are always the ones that I turn to first. Men will sometimes come and go, but girlfriends always seem to be there. We understand each other, most of us have been in the same situation or know someone who has, and are willing to give advice from the heart. I honestly don’t know what I would do without the wonderful women in my life. If you don’t have a circle of girlfriends or sisters, at least find one that you can confide in and that cares for you as a sister. I’m not a feminist, but we as women need to stick together for our own sanity! When I’m with my sisters I’m either laughing or crying and sometimes both. It’s such a stress reliever.  Some of the best times in my life have been with my sisters and my best friend. We go on vacations, road trips, bar hopping (only on occasion!), shopping, and sometimes we lay on the couch and watch HGTV until six in the evening (Elizabeth!). What I’m trying to say is that we have so much emotion and knowledge to share with each other it’s a shame to see any of it go to waste. I love the women in my life and I make sure that I tell them any chance I get. You can never have too many girlfriends!!!!!

Peace, love and total happiness!

Janice

“The Modern Day Girl’s Guide to living with Style”

Jason once told me that what ever he decides to do, he tries to do with “Style”, over the years without saying it so clearly I guess that has been my goal too. I think we all have a certain style, some are better than others, but yes, we all have our ways of making ourselves stand out a bit.

I bought this book as an “impulse buy” sometime ago at Barnes and Noble when I was purchasing a more “heavy” book as a way to lighten my mood after some serious self help. I must say it has given me more pleasure than the “self help” book ever did, and even better, it taught me quite a bit about myself, which is what we are all trying to do right?

The Little Pink Book of Elegance teaches you several different ways that you can stand out by down playing and up playing a few of the “rules of etiquette”. It covers everything from what to and not to wear to how to manage your closet and night stand. It tells you the classic way to throw a party and how not to lose your mind doing it. The do’s and don’ts of wearing make-up (you could be doing a don’t! I was) and how to have subtle manners while wearing that make-up correctly.

I faired pretty well, I was taught as a young apprentice to my Mom and Aunt Kate what mainly to strive for, but this has dialed me in a bit.

Some of the things I learned?

White Shoes? A No No…. Once she presented that after the first few times that you wear them they typically look like crap anyway, she not only convinced me not to wear them, but convinced me that it was sort of a waste of money.

Cubic Zirconia? Sure! As long as you wear them the right way, again, a great way to spend less and look great!

Spending Money on your Hair? Absolutely! It is the first thing people see when they approach you, so it should be easy to justify. I see so many really bad hair cuts, and it absolutely makes a difference. Men can get a $10 hair cut, Women however, if they have anything other than a man-do need to have a well trained stylist on their side. By the way, color is an art form, if you are not an artist; do not attempt to do art.

Green or Blue eye shadow? No. No explanation needed.

Freshly Cut Flowers? YES! They lend a certain elegance to your home or office, and you don’t have to wait for someone to send them to you either, $7 bucks at Jewel Osco, and over a week or enjoyment, Jason’s Mom taught me to cut them at an angle, under the water, stretched their life to 2 weeks, great way to save money!

Candles? Sure, as long as it doesn’t look like a witch’s séance, a few burning at all times will allow ambience and a pleasant smell throughout your home. My opinion? Candles should not smell like food, cinnamon is fine, but sugar cookie makes people sick.

Ironing? A Must. We have gotten away from ironing, people reading this that know me will laugh, but ironing is an easy way to make a piece of clothing look put together, a linen look clean and welcoming, and ironing is somewhat calming if you embrace it.

Reduced Price because of Damage? Rejection… If it requires work, it is not worth it. You can get reduced prices if you shop online, or buy less, but smart.

Tailor? Please! Too many times I see a beautiful dress (or what could be) on a woman, but it doesn’t fit correctly. She pulls at it, and looks uncomfortable; therefore ruining the result she wanted. If your clothing fits correctly, you look elegant. Buy less, spend on key items. Janice wrote a piece on those high end jeans not too long ago, absolutely worth the money. Shirts can be purchased for a lot less, which is where you save the cash. Less Rights are better than more Wrongs!

Thank you notes? Thank you, I think the Thank You Note is so needed in our society today, it personalizes much better than an email or text, plus you give someone a positive in their mailbox, and as we all know, going to the mail box is not fun. Make someone’s day a little brighter.

This is a fun book. I loved it. Please comment on ways that you make your lives more “elegant”!

My Heart is with you on your journey!

Lizzy

Dear Coffee-Talkers,

It has been a while since I last wrote. Things have been very interesting lately. I went to Mexico, Jason and I celebrated our 1 year of living happily together, My Mom and sister came for a visit, and I have been exploring my career options more than ever.

Mexico was very interesting. It has been two years since I left the country (that is too long, I know) and what a difference a few years makes. I went there to attend a wedding of my father’s dear friend’s daughter. Did you fallow that? Any who… I went with my Dad and my sixteen year old sister Becky. Oh I forgot how hard life is when you are sixteen, you love or hate everything, such black and white, I guess as you get older and the grey forms on your head, you also gain grey areas in your perspectives. Then I suppose as you get older and the grey falls out of your head, you go back into a “black and white” mode again. I was the grey between my father and sister, and they were definitely black and white.
There were people from around the world there, mainly from the UK, but I met people from Holland, Belgium, Iran, Canary Islands, and a few other places. The big difference is the way that they treated me, the world hates us now, and I am not sure if I blame them. It is a scary time for all, and I know that the Bush administration has a lot to do with it. I suppose from a far it looks like we all did this to the world, but as I finally was able to get across to most, in democracy, we all don’t get who we voted for every time. Plus, I did harshly tell the guy from the Canary Islands that if he was happy about the money that he made with us, it only makes sense that he loses money with us too. No one is winning here, but I do know this, Americans are not loved in this world anymore, it’s sad in a way, I have always been welcomed with such open arms. I found that once I made the comment “Bush is a criminal”, they tended to get off me a little bit.
I met so many kind people, Bernardo worked at the resort, and when I say “worked” I mean it, this guy worked SO hard for his living, and his family (which I saw pictures of because he kept them in his pocket at all times, so he could remember why he does work so hard), and his honor. He invited Jason and I to his home next time we are down, he said he will cook for us, I am not sure I have ever been so honored to have an invite, he walked with so much integrity, I was so thankful to meet him.
There is something to be said for the way these Mexicans live, they work so hard, and play so hard, it is truly a spice of life place.

Jason and I living together for a year now, I cannot believe that it has been that long, what a happy time. I feel so lucky, and I no longer wait for any shoes to drop. I have figured out that we are just good for one another, and much like the universe, it’s big and powerful, and there is no need to question it. I believe, I believe! I have quit asking “Why? Why? Why?” And started saying “Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!”

I am so grateful that I have met him, but most grateful for who I can be with him, me. Just goes to show, and I know I preach this all of the time, when you can learn to sit with yourself, you know when you are sitting with someone that you respect when you finally meet them. I am grateful for today.

So, I am back, I wrote a bit about being positive about an hour ago, I’d love to hear your thoughts…… I would like to hear from you all more often, I have gotten very used to having coffee with the world.

All my Love,

Lizzy

Lately I guess I have been noticing Negativity a lot more than ever. About a year ago I had read The Power of Now and The Secret, and although the concept was great, I didn’t really start living it until about 6 months ago. Jason is really easy to live with under this way of thinking because he normally has a very positive outlook on his universe and therefore projects it; I have become that way too. Optimistic to annoyance maybe, but I have found that my life is more abundant now than ever, and the facts are just that, facts.

It has been a real challenge for me to not become negative about Negativity though, when I hear it sometimes I have a tendency to get frustrated, when really, I should just think back to a time not so long ago when my glass was half empty. I know I can change my perspective on that too, it just takes a different angle of looking at it.

Money

Have you ever met someone that works so hard but never has a pot to piss in?

I have, I know a lot of these people, their work ethic is second to none, yet they are constantly complaining about their financial condition. They worry about the moneys of tomorrow even if they have enough money for today. They, by worrying, don’t enjoy the fruits of today, nor tomorrow, they are unhappy, and ungrateful, and therefore they never have security not for even one day. The Secret implies that if you say in your mind “I am worried about not having enough money” the “universe” hears that and cannot differentiate that statement from a request, and therefore gives you “not enough” money.

The key is to be grateful today, and have faith in your tomorrows if they even come.

This does not mean, stop planning for your retirement, or saving for that special goal that you have, it just means have faith that the “universe” or “god” or even “yourself” will provide you with the means to be fruitful for all days.

I have often said in the past that I hate “money”, in fact, I do not hate money, I hate the abusive relationships that people have with their and others money.

“I have and will continue to have Abundance, Thank you”

Relationships

This is a BIG ONE, there are so many people searching for love, upset about love loss, scared of never obtaining love, or even scared of losing the love they have today.

Part of these books that I read a year ago, talked about living in this moment, in this day, but I have found that most people who are not happy with the relationship status that they are in, i.e. single, married, separated, or whatever, are simply living either in the past, or in the future, and some of the real “sad” cases bounce back and forth between, but never EVER stay in the present.

Lets take Single for instance, because a lot of people think this is the worst thing to ever happen to someone, which by far is untrue. So many times these “Singles” bounce between the loves they once had and lost and the loves the may never find in the future, therefore never living for today. When I was single not too long ago, (way before I got this concept) I remember people asking me “Why are you single?” “Why aren’t you married?” “Are you looking for a boyfriend?” the concept that I was perfectly happy was far beyond any notion that they could accept. I was happy, I truly was, and I remember feeling like a bit of a “freak” because I was not nearly as upset at they thought I should be, I wasn’t upset at all.

Maybe because I had a relationship based on love and respect with myself (the first healthy relationship I had ever had, by the way), but I did not long for loves past or loves future, I had love.

Love eventually came to me, and when it did I was calm, and ready to let it sit beside me, I was not too eager, it came in a healthy way. You know with courting, and laughing, and eventually loving and respecting, and then lastly trusting.

I feel the same now as I did when I was single, I just have someone there with me, enjoying some moments.

I won’t drag on too much about marriage and separation. But I do know this if you live in the past or the future when you are in these moments the marriage or separation will with all certainty fail completely. If you need me to talk more to this topic, please feel free to coffee-talk with me about it. I have lived in the past of the marriage, and the future of the marriage and it failed miserably. I have live in the past in separation, and the future in separation, also failed.

Love is not something someone gives you, it is something that you give.

Happiness

I sat at the table a few days ago with a friend, and although the lunch we were having was great I remember my friend looking to another table and commenting on how happy they were, my friend eluded to the fact that they longed for happiness like that. My ego went unhurt, but I thought to myself that happiness is nothing other than being grateful for what is at your table, what blessings you have, and if you continuously look at those blessings, you are bound to be happy.

The key to happiness overall is being thankful or grateful for what the “universe” or your “God” or you “yourself” has given you.

If you are constantly looking at the grass on the other side, you never ever notice how beautiful your own lawn is.

Health

Health is one of the most talked about feelings on earth. How are you feeling?

I have met perfectly healthy people that always complain about their health. Therefore they always feel crappy.

I have met perfectly sick people that never complain about their health. Therefore they always feel great.

The mind is a beautiful powerful tool, I suggest we use it. I suggest we utilize it in everything that we are.

Perspectives

Your Perspective is your only truth. I am thankful for those perspectives in this world that I see as optimistic and healthy, I pray you do too….

My heart is with you on your journey,

Lizzy

Trust is such a strange word; it almost implies that you have to put yourself out there on a limb. I have noticed lately that the person for years that I trusted the least was me and after getting to know who I was, I slowly started taking my word as “gold”.

I had second guessed myself for so long when I was young, if I felt something was wrong; my brain would automatically start its “logical talk down” of how I was feeling.

I always got burned. Always.

What I started to do unconsciously is listen to my feelings, and over the last few years I have begun to trust myself without even knowing it. When I meet someone that I “feel” is not a good person for me to be around, I wait, and they always prove me right. If I feel I should not be in a situation, I leave, and I always hear stories of what went wrong. See, I believe it is our gut that is our first instinct.

You know, it is not always used to detect bad now. When I meet someone that I feel like I have a connection to, I go with it, I trust myself. I met my friend Tracey that way. A few of my friends were going for a “drink” at one of our local watering holes, and when I got there, ordered a glass of wine, and sat down, they all wanted to go somewhere else. I am no stranger to sitting somewhere alone, so I said go. They left and before you knew it I was in a great conversation with a complete stranger. I enjoyed her conversation, and strangely knew that I would be friends with her for a long, long time. I was right, we have lunch once a week now, and thank goodness I trusted myself.

Trust yourself above all others.

My heart is with you on your journey, the heart that I trust.

Lizzy