My heart is with you on this journey…. I always say this in closing, but today I give you my heart at the beginning, and here is why, when I open my heart to the world it is open, so on this particular journey I hope you come to the world open and if you need to borrow my heart to do it, so be it yours.

About five years ago, I moved from my home town, from my family, my life long friends, everything that I knew to a new start, a beginning. The fear was only shadowed by the longing for something greater, something unknown, but almost like “faith”, I knew it was out there (or in there), I couldn’t describe how exactly I knew, but my heart was telling me to go, and so I went.

For the first few months (eight to be exact) I met the first and truest of my new friends, me. I had never known myself without the influence of others, nor did I ever long to know me. For this time, I went to work, came home, night after night the same thing. I didn’t have cable, I didn’t have the internet, I had me and my heart, and my brain finally introduced the two of us. This was my biggest growth step, it was fast and furious, I realized that I, too, had a story, for so long being in sales, trained to pull everyone else’s life history out in the shortest amount of time possible, never really telling my tale, only sharing bits and pieces (the ones I thought would work best for their comfort). So for these days I “probed” myself. Basically what I was doing was walking into someone’s home (mine) that I didn’t even know, and I was talking to her, figuring out what she liked, what she didn’t like, what her dreams were, and what her fears were, and when I was done, I loved her.

 Of course I had acted like I loved me for years, if anyone described me before this transition it would probably be “full of myself”, or “cocky”, when in fact, I was lost, I was a liar, and I pretty much “sold” myself to everyone I had ever met, not knowing what or who I was selling to anyone.

This time period was not a comfortable one, it was best described as feeling your way clear through a house in the dark searching for a light switch. It was scary and kind of exciting in a haunted house kind of way, but when that light switch was flipped, there was no turning back, I could see things so clearly, I could see me.

The reason I am telling everyone about this is I truly don’t believe that until you have made friends with yourself, until you can sit with you, are you capable of sitting with others. I had never been a true friend to anyone, never been anything but a lie to everyone. I painted the scenery the way I wanted it to look, not the way it was, and until I became comfortable with the way my scenery looked, for real, I really never shared my existence with anyone.

Until you can shamelessly look in the mirror you cannot see the world with honor.

I remember THAT day so clearly. I had gone to get my bi-weekly manicure and pedicure, “my big outing”, and I was driving back to my house when I realized I was ready to meet new people, prepared to start landscaping around this home that I had created within myself. I drove past my “hide away” and pulled into the local pub for a drink. I figured it was time for people to enjoy me as I had been learning to do  for months. I had forgiven all (including myself) and I was ready to let them in. I sat down, and friends came, and came, and came, and are still coming. Sure, I have to weed my garden every now and then, but more times than not, they are beautiful flowers that make everyday brighter.

The reality is the more confident I am with my heart the more comfortable it becomes to let people into it. Today I am so at ease with me; I have become so strong over the last five years just by letting me into my heart, and then letting others in.

My suggestion for you today is to gather a new friend from somewhere, even if it happens to be yourself. Keep gathering friends after that. You can have too much money, too many things, too much space, too much time, but never can you have too many friends. Especially when your truest friend lies within yourself!

My Heart Is With You on Your Journey,

Lizzy

I need to ask everyone a question. Have you ever gotten into the routine of watching t.v. and eating?  Come home, sit down, eat, zone out… 

Too many of us have does this.  Long gone are the days of sitting at the dinner table everynight with no t.v. or any other electronic distraction.

Some have always watched tv through their meals, and some have accidentally gotten into the routine by one night turning into two then three then….

I have a challenge for all of you.  Especially those with children.  Make dinner a priority. 

I, actually we, have decided to make our dinner time the most important time of the day.  And the more time it takes, the better!  Long gone are the days of Fast Food. 
I am including my whole family in cooking.  My children jump in with amazing excitement.  They love helping.  Usually we make the sides while my husband cooks the meat on the grill.  Then, even though we are home, we set the table with more attention then the most fancy of restaurants.  The more details, the more pride my children have for the meal.  Next we start a pot of coffee and bring the food to the table.  With NO T.V.! 

And here’s the kicker, We Talk To Each other.  I know an amazing concept, right?

We take our time eating, and cleaning up our dishes together, never rushing the meal, then we all get a cup of coffee and visit some more!!! (even the kids get coffee, but the younger the child, the more milk added).

Then we have our children get ready for bed as my husband and I have another cup of coffee. Visiting about our day.  Showing our children that we are important to eachother.  Then we tuck our kids in bed and visit some more.

We are getting to know each other and our children all over again.

I am now posing a challenge to everyone, children or no children, to slow down, get out your best dishes, and have dinner together.  Visit with eachother.  Don’t look at your clock and take your time.

You never know, you might create your very own New/Old tradition!

And Please all of you, do this for yourself and your family, and comment to this.  Let me know how it works for you.- Kate

Kate,

You have an excellent point here, I remember sitting together as a family, getting to know one another, respecting the honor of family and friendship together, even respecting my mothers table as its own entity, it brought everything into perspective as you looked into the faces of what was truly important and faced the ferustrations of one another head on (it is not always easy to share your existance with another). I think it allows you to live so much more for the moment, especially when you make that key choice to stretch out the “good” moments. That is what we are here to do, bathe in our blessings.

For the singles out there this is as vital if not more, make the choice to bask in a dinner with a friend or family member when you get the chance, and more importantly, make those chances happen.

Thank you Katie, for reminding us to STRETCH OUT THE GOOD MOMENTS….

My heart is with you on your journey,

 Lizzy

My Aunt Kate has a gift, she can make a house a home in record time. Last week I emailed her for a few ideas for all of us. I should have looked around my own home, but after you have been doing it for so long, sometimes its hard to realize what exactly you are doing, it becomes second nature. There is nothing better than coming home and enjoying a sanctuary, and second is presenting a comfort to your guests. When you know that there is a place that is your own that has the ability to immediately make you feel relaxed the rest of the world seems a lot less “annoying”. Your friends will be more likely to want to come to a place that you are in a balanced state, therefore they come more often.

Candles

Fresh flowers

Brighter light bulbs in a dim room

New hand towels on the bathroom vanity

Hand milled soaps

Books

A throw on the back of the sofa or chair

New pillows if a new sofa is out of the question

A silver or leather picture frame

Anything monogrammed (frames, towels, shower curtain)

Lemons or limes in a jar or bowl

Sea shells (Nate Burkess says every room should have something from the sea)

Don’t forget curb appeal with a large container of geraniums out front

Clean, clean, clean – nothing looks good unless you apply this principle to your home.   

Everything has a place, no clutter

Color on the walls, find a color that comforts you, and paint every wall that same color, white is no good.

Bedding, comfort is king, but make it beautiful.

Any ideas out there? 

I have been raised to use all of these tips, they help to make my house a home. Thank you Aunt Kate, for giving me the tools over the years to make me comfortable where ever I am.

COFFEE TALKERS…..

The first Product Recommendation of this month is probably the best one I have found so far…..

This stuff is the fountain of youth….

 Two Wednesdays ago  ”Beach Day” with some of my face to face Coffee Talkers my friend Stephanie busts out this face and body mask… She had all kinds of samples to give out, and so she did. She had tried the product when one of her clients had told her about what it does. She liked it so much her salon was taking the line on.

I took my sample home, and set it aside for about a week, here I thought “great, its another Mary Kay, Beauti-Control, Avon, Clinique, blah, blah, blah promise to fix all your problems, just another let down”….. The next week, I slapped it on, skeptical as I was, I said I’d do it, and so I did.

This stuff is GREAT….. A “HOLY COW” kinda good.

Basically it is Volcanic Clay that you rub all over your face (and Body), let it sit for 10 minutes, twice or three times a week, and wash it of with a warm cloth.  It doesn’t have any smell really, and it feels so GOOD!

After the first treatment, I no longer had ANY black heads….. My Skin looked “even”…. The damage that I have done for years of sitting on beaches for a week at a time (getting my moneys worth of the sun) was substantially removed. My worry wrinkle in the middle of my forehead (that I planned one day to get botoxed) was much less noticable.

I thought…. What is this crap?

You can use it on your entire body, it tightens the skin, so things like “Stretch Marks” and “Cottage Cheese legs” are instantly improved. But this is the weirdest thing, it “detoxifies” your skin, so you actually can see the “gunk” rising to the surface…. It also removes dead skin, and there for makes your skin look so fresh and healthy.

I bought the “BIG JUG” (24 ounces) of it that will last 6 months from Stephanie for $100. Cheaper than monthly facials or Botox for that matter, and far more efficient! You can buy the smaller jar (8 ounces) of it for $42 bucks. I also bought the eye and lip treatment for $35, because I think your eyes and lips can essentially tell your true age.

Here is what it fixes-

• Cellulite
• Fine lines and wrinkles
• Stretch marks
• Scars
• Under-eye puffiness
• Crow’s feet
• Blemishes
• Enlarged pores
• Dull, dry skin
• Uneven skin tone

“Volcanic Ash Clay has been embraced throughout history for its extraordinary health and cosmetic benefits. Now, these legendary beauty benefits can be yours with Clay Essentials, a unique new line of skincare masques you can enjoy right at home. Our nourishing clay formulas restore your skin’s natural radiance, softness and clarity—at a fraction of the cost of professional spa treatments.”- Clay Essentials TM

This is Stephanie’s contact email, she said she will charge you a smail shipping fee, but it is totally worth it….

   redsathome@sbcglobal.net

Thank you Stephanie this will make a big difference in how people feel about themselves. Just another way Coffee Talking makes us feel better….  

Liz~

I could not agree more with your thoughts during your gathering. Taking the time to simply ask questions and having an open mind to understanding a different point of view will quickly become enlightening and intriguing.
In regards to your friend, I also agree that the best thing to do for her or anyone making a life changing decision is to simply listen, support, and help her paint a picture of where she sees herself in the future. All while encouraging her to make a choice that will put her in the “future” picture that she painted for herself. Giving some advice is only going to work if they are open to receiving it and that can only happen if they know where they would like to be at the end of the journey.
I remember a friend of mine that was in a relationship that was unhealthy and truely stiffling her potentential as a person. Now I truely take zero credit for the choices that she made, but I do know and take pride in the fact that I was just there for her each week in that local diner where we simply listening to each other and encouraged one another to make choices that were best for us. For a couple of twenty- somethings meetings really gave us a better understanding of our lives and our direction. One weekly meeting at the diner resulted the same passionate, energetic, and enlightening conversation. I make my way to the restroom and when I returned, I returned to a woman who made a diffcult but necessary choice to end a relationship that was not part of the “future” picture that she had painted for herself over our many weekly outings.
Having a friend to sit down with over a cup of coffee who will not judge, but encourage and bring clarity to our chaotic lives is invaluable. You are not only receiving the support but it is also rewarding when you are giving it.

I always say that it is easier to see the big picture and the root of the problem when you are on the outside looking in, so having a coffee talk friend to help find and lead you to that clarity is priceless.

Your site is a perfect reflection of you and the person that I have had the privelage of knowing and calling a friend. I am happy to know that more people have the opportunity to share this side of you.

Thank you for being my coffee talk friend Liz. - Heather